A MENTORING MANAGER WHO MADE THINGS HAPPEN

By HQ Staff

Fitting of his birthplace in Hollywood, California, Brother Wineman achieved celebrity status in Phi Kappa Psi by mentoring and challenging undergraduates to reach their full potential. He taught thousands of chapter officers to lead with integrity and shared the art of negotiating with decades of initiated members.

Paul was the 61st National President, Founding Chairman of the Nelson Leadership Institute, a member of the Order of the S.C., and was a Foundation Trustee at the time of his passing. He entered Chapter Eternal on February 17, 2024, at the age of 87.

After graduating from the University of Washington, Paul served in the U.S. Army, assigned to the Office of Chief of Information at the Pentagon and later as the U.S. Army Airborne-Special Forces Advisor to the Imperial Iranian Army. 

In 1965, Paul left the Army to obtain a master’s in Middle Eastern Studies, which he received from the American University in Beirut, Lebanon. After serving several corporations in sales roles, Paul formed his own firm to assist American companies wishing to do business in the Middle East. Paul continued for decades to negotiate contracts and train American corporations in negotiation techniques. 

Putting his vast experience to use for Phi Psi, Paul co-created much of the curriculum for the American Leadership Academy (ALA). This led to countless visits to chapters teaching young men leadership skills and encouraging a culture of mentorship and ultimately to the development of the Wineman Mentoring Advantage Program.

Paul’s legacy, which started with his father’s initiation at Allegheny College in 1918, has spanned a century and continues to have a positive impact connecting undergraduate and alumni members today. His typical parting words to brothers he met were: “Phi Psis: You don’t wait for things to happen; you make things happen. Phi Psis are successful because they work for what they want.” 

Brothers Remember Brother Wineman

“Paul was a Brother who in life felt like everyone’s big brother. He was quick to praise but also just as quick to offer a few words of corrective action! He mentored not only hundreds of young men but also fellow Foundation Trustees from time to time. We were all better people for it. RIP!”

– Don Fites Valpo ’53

“I first met Paul Wineman in 1998, as he had been invited by a pledge brother (Kerry McMahan ’55) to speak at the Washington Alpha Founders Day Dinner. Paul’s presentation was blunt and gruff, but that was his style. At the same time, the presentation was enthralling as he recounted his upbringing in Iran, the challenges of his arriving at the University of Washington as a de facto Persian, his service after graduation in the Green Berets including his role in training soldiers in the Iranian Army who were serving the Shah of Iran, and his time spent in Beirut, Lebanon. I recall everyone in the room enjoying the uniqueness of Paul’s story.

After the dinner, Paul posed a question to me: ‘Jim,’ he said, ‘tell me why Phi Kappa Psi is relevant to today’s students.’ I don’t recall exactly what I uttered in response, save for a reference to the ALA and how he should visit Cabo San Lucas to personally experience Phi Psi’s relevance for himself. But I do distinctly remember the gaze of Paul’s eyes, reflecting sheer skepticism of my response.

Still, some weeks later, Paul called me and asked in his stern voice (as those who knew him will recall), ‘Jim, this is Paul Wineman. If I were to want to attend the Cabo San Lucas spring break training when the Washington Alpha undergraduates are present, how would I do so?’ He attended the March 1998 session, having coordinated his arrival with Jerry Nelson UCLA ’48. And so began a multi-decade participation by Paul at the national level of Phi Kappa Psi.

I was — and am — forever grateful for having met and become friends with Paul Wineman. He was genuinely a Brother of conviction, confidence, reverence, and loyalty. His passing leaves a great void. But I firmly believe that Paul developed and left a tremendous impact on our Fraternity and unquestionably left a legacy of furthering the relevance of Phi Kappa Psi to thousands of undergraduates, alumni, leaders, and Brothers.”

– Jim Boyle Washington ’88

“We are fortunate in our lives to have known this interesting, remarkable yet private man. He was a huge contributor to both the Washington Alpha Chapter and the National Fraternity. He helped many actives focus their lives for success. He supported and partnered with Jerry Nelson strengthening the entire Phi Psi system organizationally and financially. I am deeply and emotionally touched by his passing.”

– Ed Jensen Washington ’56

“Paul Wineman possessed a rare gift of empathy and kindness that touched the lives of everyone around him. Whether it was offering a listening ear, providing sage advice, bantering with someone about their lack of negotiation skills, or simply sharing a warm smile, Paul had a way of making everyone feel seen, heard, and valued. Brother Wineman’s passing will be keenly felt in our strong band, but his legacy will live on in the many projects and initiatives he was involved in, and more importantly, in the countless lives he impacted along the way – mine included.”

– Shawn Collinsworth Indiana State ’91

“I first met Paul Wineman as a sophomore and recently initiated to Pennsylvania Beta at Allegheny College, Paul’s father’s chapter and alma mater. Paul was visiting for the first time to make that personal connection to his father’s experiences. I wrote a short presentation acknowledging the many decades that Phi Psi had been part of the Wineman family and gave him a copy, which he carried with him for many years after. As anyone who had the pleasure of listening to one of his speeches can attest, he was very proud of that legacy in his family. Paul was truly invested in our organization and especially our undergraduate members. He served as a mentor to countless Phi Psis across the nation. He was a serious person but had a sharp sense of humor. He was a great asset to Phi Psi, and he will be sorely missed.

– RJ Proie Allegheny ’00

“Paul Wineman possessed an exceptional ability to quickly understand people. He was direct and always spoke his mind. Paul had a way of encouraging others to focus on their goals and succeed, without passing judgment on their flaws. Instead, he helped them identify and build on their strengths for a better future. Paul was not only a great leader but also a team player who took the time to understand the mission and the individual roles of each team member. I am forever grateful for having known Paul and for the guidance he provided. He will be dearly missed.”

– Mark Lipka Lycoming ’04

“It’s hard for me to believe I’ve known Paul for 70 years. From when we were pledges at Washington Alpha, in the fall of 1954 – when he was a thin, not-very-tall kid with thick glasses.

Paul would call about every other week. When the phone rang at 6 a.m., I always knew who it was. Inevitably, we would reminisce about the ‘old days’ and laugh about the antics of different upperclassmen, when we were freshmen. To us, those were the best of times in the Fraternity.

Paul felt that every undergraduate should have an older mentor, someone coming from a similar career, who could share life lessons with a younger Phi Psi. He mentored hundreds of undergraduates in his years visiting chapters. Paul received calls, letters, notes, and emails from many of them sharing their successes. He saved every one of those messages.

I will miss those 6 a.m. phone calls.”

– Stan Kohagen Washington ’55